Thursday, September 13, 2007

the art of control

I am naked.


You're here.

You've told me I must practice. I'm too selfish. I must learn to ask and to wait for your permission. You call it climax control. You say we need to work on this. And I want to please you, Sir. So I dutifully wait for your instruction.

Lying on the bed, as you specified, I begin to stroke my clit. Slowly. Purposeful circles and alternating pressure. I am mindful of my task, but watch for your approval.

You hand me a toy. I am wary. This always pushes me over the edge....quickly. But I want to please you Sir, and so I obey. And as you sit on the side of my bed, dressed, hands folded in your lap; you intently watch my naked form, assessing my compliance.

It's quick. I start to feel like I could cum. So I tell you. But no, it's not time. And at your command, I reluctantly remove the toy from my throbbing clit. I want it, I ache. But it's not time, and it's not up to me.

When you tell me, I use the toy. When I start to feel like I could cum, I have to stop. Over and over. Exquisite torture. Feeling that build-up to climax, and then stopping. It almost hurts. I have trouble concentrating. I have trouble keeping my eyes open. I bite my lower lip. I want to cum. But it's not time.

Each time I apply this evil pulsating toy to my aching clit, I feel that budding's happening quicker. I'm struggling. I want to cum. But it's not time.

I start to beg you. Please Sir, can I cum? Please?


I want to cry. I'm frustrated. Can't you see I need this?


Over and over you tell me. Use it. Stop. Now. Stop. Again. Stop.

Over and over I ask you. Please Sir, can I cum?



And for what I think is the final time, I barely graze my tortured clit with this toy.

Waves of pleasure, tight and hot, wash over me. oh god fuck yes yes oh fuck yes please oh god yes fuck yes yes

deep exhalation of breath

Leave it on, you say.

I'm tender. Too sore. But it's not up to me to decide. With well hidden reluctance I continue to apply this violently pulsating toy to my tender swollen clit.

Tears come to my eyes. I can't.

You can and you will.

and then again i feel it and i tell you and you say its alright to let it happen and i cum again hard and throbbing my muscles tighten i cant breathe my heart is in my throat fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck

i am quite breathless now

my heart is pounding

You're not finished. Leave it on.

i want to cry im tired i cant please

Just breathe baby, slowly. Just breathe. You can do this. For me.

And so I try to slow my breathing down. I concentrate on your face. On your eyes. And suddenly I see that all you want is for me to experience an outstanding level of pleasure. That your purpose is to teach me something and show me something and share something exquisite with me. And so I do this, to please you; and you do this, to please me.

The sensation is different this time. Pressure. Hot, wet. Stream. Flow. I can feel a pool forming underneath me. Once, twice. I buck and thrust. Moan quietly. A third wave. Wet skin and sheets.


Now you can stop.

And in my mind, I feel the gentle, warm touch of your hand. I hear your soothing words of praise. I feel pleased and comforted.

And even though you weren't really here with me, I felt your presence today.

Tuesday, September 04, 2007

the ties that bind me to you